Dark matters

My blog isn't going as expected. Writing posts is hard. I get more ideas than i manage to write down. I mean not only writing down, but making a nice easy to read post out of it. I've read a bit about disorganized thinking and when i read what i have written, it pretty much looks like it. My thoughts are jumping back and forth. It is an advantage when thinking, but not when i want to communicate my ideas.

I admire those, who can write well and everybody seems to get the points across. So far i have not found out what is more important, the easy reading or the points. I'm writing this blog because i don't want the results of my quest get lost. So i'm pretty much focusing on the points. However, the one post that has been read the most, was written in an inspirational moment.

You already know that i want to find out all there is to know about pedophilia. My way of disorganized thinking, where my thoughts easily jump light years from fact to fact, makes it a surprising adventure, at least for me. The ideas do i get from reading as much as i can, from as many different fields as possible. I don't think that pedophilia can be fully explained using one field of science only. Too much different stuff seems to be involved.

The puzzle

They way i think resembles a puzzle game. I'm trying to keep an overview and are turning pieces here and there. Actually i'm all over the board and are connecting pieces and tearing them apart again where ever i'm looking at. Some researchers start with research questions like: What is the cause of pedophilia? The problem with questions like that are the hidden assumptions. The previous question assumes the existence of a cause that "creates" pedophilia in one way or another.  Moreover, it focuses on pedophilia. This might lead to a dead end. Imagine a game of dice, where we only investigate the outcomes of 6 eyes. What causes the dice to turn up with 6 eyes? When assembling a puzzle, one does not start with any question, one merely examines the bits and connects them.

More often than not, i'm trying to write about it when the picture is not finished. I do so, because the picture becomes bigger all the time and it's probably never finished. My picture is basically multi-dimensional, but for my blog, all thoughts have to be put into a linear order. This is the hard part.


As a older teenager, i learned about pederasty of the ancient Greeks, but that was all i knew until last year. The Decent of Chester story enticed me to think along its lines. The story is a nice read, but has obvious flaws. However, it points out a major common mistake - the chronocentric approach. One might not be able to explain pedophilia using  current settings. Hence, my first question was: Would pedophilia  made sense 5000 years ago? Another mistake is forgetting that current human behavior is strongly regulated by moral and laws. A personal observation questioned the sexual nature of pedophilia.

Evolution is often misunderstood. The goal of human evolution is not a society where each person lives in comfort. There are many, "who have made it", who are considered "successful"; but who are not willing to reproduce. This thinking is turned upside down. The goal of evolution is not to provide humans with a nice live, but to ensure that genes get replicated. Taking it to the extreme, if "white trailer park trash" people fornicate like rabbits, then they are evolutionarily superior. Our personal judgement might differ from what evolution prefers.

Another mistake is to assume that evolution has any goals or that there are any reasons for everything. Nothing is selected for because it might be beneficial in the end. Evolution does not think, it only is brutally preferring the one with advantage, might that advantage be as tiny as possible. After writing almost 2 paragraphs, i realized my mistake. Evolution does not prefer anything - it's not a conscious presence or a thing. Evolution is more like a law of nature dictating, which genes survive.

One of the next blog posts i have in mind is about some kind of pedophilia and it's role in human evolution. An earlier piece turned out to be wrong, so i have to make sure that i'm not missing the obvious signs of mistakes. But another appearing piece is a shade darker.

Psychology and Neoteny

Human psychology has one common denominator - the human. Therefore everything is linked to everything else. So i'm not completely wrong, if i see connections everywhere. The question is: Does a certain connection matter? To make the matter worse, in psychology there is no clear cause and effect. Often the assumed effect has influence on what is claimed to be the cause. Hence, i'm trying to visualize those pieces as part of a network. Everybody has heard of evil cycles, and that might be a good approximation. If the feedback is strong enough, then some loop becomes active and a phenomenon can be observed.

Psychology gets even more interesting, when put into connection with the evolution of humans and the human brain. This stuff called neoteny has a huge impact. Coming to that conclusion, i tweeted:

The discussion of #pedophilia must include #neoteny. Neoteny has more influence on psychology than one might think.

This tweet got me over 20 times more impressions than i have followers. Somehow it hit a nerve and got me thinking more about neoteny. Humans are sometimes called the juvenile ape (that is what neoteny is about). Now, that makes humans some kind of a super breed. Neoteny in humans must have been selected for and probably still is. This evolutionarily pressure might have some side effects. Breeders of dogs know that too much of selection for a certain trait can ruin the offspring. If sexual orientation is indeed neotenous, then it might be fragile. Following that train of thoughts gets me into the darker areas of the bigger picture.

Should i avoid the darker sides? I already got the advice to do it. Dealing with those dark matters might lead to self-hate and depression. That is true. Avoiding the darker side might make me more happy, but i know that it is an illusion. Once i set out on my quest, i feel obligated to consider all aspects.

Faulty neoteny

Humans mature much later than they should. Our closest cousins in the animal kingdom are adults by age 7 or 8. Human maturity is much delayed. There are adults suffering from the Highlander-syndrome, who never grow up. Those are the extreme cases, but everybody knows somebody who looks much younger than their age. Not only do they look much younger, they give the impression to be younger on an emotional level. Something is either responsible for either that or absent. In an earlier post i wrote: "Sometimes, things are not caused, but rather not prevented." Here, a faulty mechanism might be at work (or lazy).

In Sexual orientation or what is wrong with dogs? i came to the understanding of sexual orientation as based on neotenous attachment. Most people are looking for love, not just sex. It seems, one needs to have the right dosage of neoteny to get it right. Too low a dosage and one behaves like an animal when it comes to sex. But what happens, if one got a dosage that is too high? 

Maturation in youths is accompanied by a brain development process called myelination. Simply put, the axons of nerves get a fatty insulation. This process is thought to be initiated or controlled by sexual hormones, for which the HPG axis is responsible. There are some studies showing that this axis does not work properly in homosexuals and pedophiles. If this dysfunction has any influence on the myelination, then the question arises: How is the missing white matter related? Is it the fatty insulation that should have showed up on those sMRI pictures?

Evolution formed humans as juvenile apes, driving the neotenous features to an extreme. In some sense humans are driven onto an edge, some are pushed over. The best racing cars in Formula 1 have engines that only hold one race. If engineers had their way, they should break down the second the car crosses the finish line. It is the same with the tyres, if one can finish the race with the current set, one should not enter the box for a change. Humans mature at an age several times older than our cousins. With our high maintenance brain humans are very much the fragile Formula 1 cars of nature. Part of the entertainment in Formula 1 is the anticipated event of breakdowns, the question is which team is the unlucky one. 


Some pedophiles hope that science eventually will find out the reason for pedophilia and that this will end the stigmatization. Sometimes this hope seems to be delusional. There have already been published books like Feierman or articles by Bruce Rind. They tend to be ignored by the media and public or cause an outcry. The actions in the USA don't leave much hope that science will help. 

When i'm in the mood for conspiracy thought, i can imagine that the cause of pedophilia is already known. But those involved in research need their funding. Publishing the final result will ultimately make that field of research obsolete. What are those researchers gonna do? Flipping burgers?

1 comment :

  1. The cause is already known and so is the way to control it has been for a very long time but think of it like this. . .if we control paedophilia what other criminals will take up such huge amounts of space in jails earn money for courts and those involved such as solicitors and the police. You rightly say research will be lost and thus folk won't earn from that. Look at all the staff in the probation services psychology in and out of prisons and so much more all of them would be unemployed. i recommend you read the works of Robert Forde in relation to your work